Silly girls, and older boys.

So, you're in high school and you meet a boy, a muso, he's the year above you, so he'll be going to College in a few months and you'll be left in this school hell hole by yourself.

You get to know him, he's sweeter than you thought. Slowly but surely, you're falling for him. but no, you think, this can't be right.

The end of the year comes and he departs, you try to think about how you're going to survive without him for a year. He tells you its going to be okay, you're the smartest person he knows; but you still doubt yourself.

You feel the need to be with him, so he'll take your hand and protect you from the ghosts.

The holidays come and go, you find yourself talking to him all the time, late night phone calls and the texting all the time. You've fallen for him, head over heels.
But you're afraid to tell him. Afraid he'll push you away from him. How were you supposed to know that he loved you?

Its sky fire, you can tell he's been drinking, you argue, you can't even remember what it was about. You start to silently cry.

Thats it, nothing more,


for months, nothing, no late night phone calls, not even a text.


after the third month, you can't take it anymore, its tearing you up on the inside, you need to talk to him. You tell him you miss him, he replies that it'll never be the same, you sigh knowing taht this is true.
At first it's hard, but he starts calling you every night again, making you giggle, playing you music, making you love him more.

 He thought once you were single he might have a chance, that you were going to follow your heart to him.
But no, you made a mistake, that nearly ruined what you had with him. You met someone else who you thought you liked.

Four months had passed, you couldn't deny your feelings for him any longer. You loved him.. You couldn't jump into a relationship straight away, so you waited... and waited.. until the 11th. When your wish finally came true.

For months, it had been bliss, perfect. But you thought, why would he love me? no this can't be right, he wouldn't. You trusted him, told him everything, even your deep dark secrets.

You got worried that he was going to leave you. All alone. You started to pick fights with him, it hurt the both of you a lot, you didn't mean to do it, let alone realise when you were doing it until it was too late.

Its going on 6 months, its getting serious, you love him, but scared that you're going to loose him. You fight with him, and hurt him, you don't get why you're so angry, and so hurt, he's never done anything to you on purpose.

So you say you want space for a weekend, just to see what its like, it could be good for the both of you, you even give him a free pass, hoping that he wouldnt hook up with anyone, it'd almost kill you if he did. He's speechless. And hurt. You take it back when you realise, this could be the last, this could push him away, hurt him beyond tomorrow. You say you're afraid he wont love you anymore. You call him, the first time its like he rejected you your call, you let out a sob, compose yourself and try again. he picks up this time, you're relieved. He sounds distant and busy, Maybe this is him giving you the space you wanted. You say you think he's busy and talk to him tomorrow. You say goodbye with tears rolling down your cheeks. You hang up. You lay awake all night, crying, wishing he was there to hold you and tell you everything going to be okay.

You finally send him a text at 11, you've been wanting to send it for hours.

He replied, you're suprised, but relieved. He says he loves you, that pulls at your heart strings. All you want is to hold him, feel the warmth from his skin.

He says he misses you, you think to yourself, but not as much as you miss him. He was probably up all night too. Even though he has important things to do today.

He says he thinks he finishes at two. You hope he does, maybe he'll want to see you, and you can see him.


Maybe everything going to be alright after all...